Believe me, no one knows better than I do what I look like in the mirror! Yes, I know that I have gained some weight over the last few years. I used to tell myself that it was still baby-fat from the birth of our last child Sierra. She will turn thirty this summer. Okay, that excuse didn’t work.
Then I tried to bribing myself with promised gifts once I achieved weight loss accomplishments. If I would lose the first ten pounds, then I would award myself with a pedicure. If I lost another additional ten pounds, then by golly, I would treat myself with getting those eyelash extensions that I see so many women sporting these days.
To date, I still have unpolished toenails, rough calloused heels, and stubby eyelashes.
I know also that B.J. our son who is a successful personal trainer shakes his head at me in frustration. He has tried to work with me for years and encourage me to lose a few inches of blubber and eat a healthier lifestyle.
Oh, I’ll do great on his program for a short time: typically about twenty-four hours. Then I’m back to my old unhealthy habits.
So I thought that I would share a couple of conversations that happened with me to where my weight gain was very obvious and awkward.
Back in November while Bear and I were in Albuquerque, New Mexico for the Western Music Association convention, I ran into an old acquaintance. Karen (pronounced Car-in) is a beautifully stunning and petite woman with striking red hair. She has always shown us kindness and support for Barry’s music. So I am not throwing her under the bus! I just found this to be funny.
I first met eyes with Karen that weekend as she was exiting the main stage area after a performance. I smiled at her and said “Hello!”
She replied with a quick but polite hello and then continued to walk on by and returned to her conversation with the gentleman by her side.
“Hm? Well, maybe she was busy. I’ll catch her later.” I thought to myself and brushed it off.
Sure enough, the next day I spotted her standing by herself across the room from me in the large hotel lobby. This time I decided to approach her directly face to face.
“Karen?” I smiled as I drew closer to where she was standing.
“Yes?” She burrows her eyebrows in concentration as I see that she recognizes my voice but that’s about it.
“It’s me, Victoria Ward. So nice to see you again . . .”
“Oh Victoria! I’m so sorry! I didn’t recognize you! You’ve . . .” Karen catches herself here while her eyes dart to the ground as she squirms with the sudden embarrassment of not finishing her sentence.
But in my mind I complete it for her “ . . . gained so much weight”.
I throw a life line to my friend drowning in uncomfortable circumstances.
“I know I’ve changed since you saw me last.. .” and we continue with other niceties for a few minutes skirting my weight issue. Bless her heart! She is still a sweetheart to me.
The most memorable encounter among the many that I have experienced happened after one of Barry’s concerts. I was behind the merchandise table in my usual spot while Bear was standing off to the side so he could be available for any questions or autographs. A gentleman approached the table and began small talk with me about the weather, the season the Broncos were having, and other non-important trivial pursuit material. And then he changed courses and got down to real reason for this conversation –
He pointed out his spouse to me who was standing approximately fifteen feet away visiting with some other folks.
“You know, you should really visit with my wife . . . “ He says as he reaches into his shirt pocket.
“Really? Why is that?” I innocently require.
“I think she could help you . . .”
He hands me a business card. It’s for a weight loss plan.
Time stood still as I stared at the card. Out of curiosity Bear had stepped over to glance over my shoulder to see what I was looking at. He immediately recoiled back to safe distance out of the range of any shrapnel that might fly his way. Bear shot me a look of “PLEASE don’t hit him Vic! Don’t punch him here in a church!”
I dryly thanked the man with no emotion through clenched teeth as I stuffed the piece of small square offensive paper into my purse. It was torn into little shards once I got outside to the truck.
So there you have it my friends. These are my top two recommendations of what not to say to chubby people like me!